{"id":1389,"date":"2009-11-30T12:42:39","date_gmt":"2009-11-30T19:42:39","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/attractwomenanywhere.com\/blog\/?p=1389"},"modified":"2010-05-31T22:29:24","modified_gmt":"2010-06-01T05:29:24","slug":"dating-attraction-tips-for-the-socially-fit-man-part-1","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/attractwomenanywhere.com\/blog\/2009\/11\/30\/dating-attraction-tips-for-the-socially-fit-man-part-1\/","title":{"rendered":"Dating &#038; Attraction Tips for the Socially Fit Man!  (Part 1)"},"content":{"rendered":"<h2 style=\"text-align: center;\"><span style=\"color: #ff0000;\">Dating &amp; Attraction Tips for the Socially Fit Man<\/span><\/h2>\n<p>.\u00a0<\/p>\n<p>I was talking to a\u00a0 female pal the other day, and we started to talk about her dating life, the guys she meets, &amp; the dates she occasionally goes on.\u00a0 She tells me about her dating experiences from time to time, and I always find it interesting.\u00a0\u00a0 It gives me a unique perspective to be able to see things from both sides.\u00a0<\/p>\n<p>\u00a0So a little about my female acquaintance:\u00a0\u00a0 She is an attractive blond with a great career who by all accounts is a successful person.\u00a0 Historically, she&#8217;s been involved in various long term relationships.\u00a0 Currently seeking a guy to date that would lead to something more serious.<\/p>\n<p>\u00a0Shoud be easy enough, right?\u00a0 So what&#8217;s the problem?\u00a0 \u00a0She meets two types of men primarily.\u00a0<\/p>\n<ul class=\"unIndentedList\">\n<li>The Players.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>These are the guys looking for hookups, getting laid, partying, one night stands, getting drunk often, and etc&#8230;\u00a0 Pretty self explanatory.\u00a0 They&#8217;re fun to spend time with, they&#8217;re interesting and demonstrate some personality but lack substance.<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>\u00a0\u00a0 The well put-together men.\u00a0 Guys who have their shit together, lack any sort of edge.\u00a0<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>\u00a0<\/p>\n<p>For lack of a better term, we could call them &#8220;<em>Squares<\/em>.&#8221; They lack sexual appeal on some level, but they have everything else going for them.\u00a0 They&#8217;d be great for a long term relationship IF they could just fix a few minor points.\u00a0<\/p>\n<p>\u00a0This Blog Entry is for the latter group of guys.\u00a0 If you have your stuff together, and think you need a bit of help in attracting more women, this post is for you.\u00a0 You&#8217;ve stumbled upon the right blog.\u00a0 There is a &#8220;Seduction Community&#8221; out there and its advice has general good points, but it will also be more harmful in the long run.\u00a0<\/p>\n<p>If you&#8217;re aware of that community, then chances are you&#8217;ve had your fair share of mishaps along the way.\u00a0 You could try going the cocky\/funny route, come off as a condescending douchebag, or you could try going the neg\/peacock route and make yourself come across as an idiot., but really, you&#8217;re better than that.\u00a0<\/p>\n<p>\u00a0Most Dating-Advice in that realm is written to the tune of &#8220;How to Get Laid, How to pick up chicks, how to bang strippers, how to attract night club girls,&#8221; and so forth.\u00a0 It&#8217;s essentially written as a blueprint for\u00a0lo self-esteem guys on how to attract low self-esteem women.\u00a0 That&#8217;s fine and dandy, but then, where is the advice for a guy who actually has a cool group of friends, has a life, and just wants advice on the finer points?<\/p>\n<p>\u00a0This post is for the guy who has life together.\u00a0 He has a career, social circle of friends who are also successful, and is a viable member of society.\u00a0 He just needs a few minor adjustments to help his &#8220;Game&#8221; so to speak.\u00a0 What he does not need is &#8220;Routine Stacks&#8221; to approach club skanks, or dressing like a circus reject.\u00a0 He wants to be able to date women of his choice.\u00a0\u00a0 I happen to know a few such guys, and let&#8217;s be honest here: It sucks to see them struggle because they&#8217;re the ones who need the least amount of work to be successful.\u00a0 They have everything else going for them already.\u00a0 They&#8217;re the ones who deserve the higher quality women.\u00a0<\/p>\n<p>Disclaimer:\u00a0 If you have aspiration of being a PUA [Pick Up Artist,] enjoy discussing &#8220;Game-Strategy&#8221; to no end, like to idolize dating gurus, and throw out three letter acronyms like they were good luck charms, this post isn&#8217;t for you.\u00a0 Come back and read other posts that are more relevant to you.<\/p>\n<p>Back to our socially well-adjusted guys.\u00a0 Where are you going wrong in your dating?<\/p>\n<p>You meet a girl you like.\u00a0 You have things in common, and for intensive purposes should have a good match, but there is no spark and your interactions seem to dwindle after a while.\u00a0 Part of this is due to the fact that you haven&#8217;t created an attractive vibe that&#8217;ll complete the puzzle.\u00a0 You need to add a bit of sexual tension and a bit of excitement to your interactions.\u00a0<\/p>\n<p>So let&#8217;s talk about how you&#8217;re going to do that.\u00a0 This is part 1 of this series:\u00a0<\/p>\n<p>\u00a0You ought to start by applying simple concepts into your everyday behavior.\u00a0 Implementing a few changes will make a drastic difference in your interactions.\u00a0<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>\u00a0 <span style=\"color: #ff0000;\">More Emotionally Charged Conversation.<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>This simply implies that you probably have too much of a &#8220;Matter of Fact&#8221; attitude and you engage in too much logical conversation.\u00a0 Your way of talking about the weather, the office, or even your last weekend getaway is too fact oriented.\u00a0 Your conversations do not induce any emotional reaction. <span style=\"text-decoration: underline;\">They simply do not trigger an emotional response<\/span>.\u00a0 Now, not every conversation has to be some super dramatic event, and nor do you have the bitch-slap someone across the face to get a reaction.\u00a0\u00a0 It&#8217;s not only a matter of what topics you choose but it&#8217;s also presentation.\u00a0 HOW you deliver and present your conversational topics &amp; stories makes a gigantic difference in their effectiveness.<\/p>\n<p>\u00a0You could take very simple topics, such as being forced to work more hours at the office, or your landlord is increasing your rent.\u00a0 You could present those topics in a very logical manner or you could present them wrapped in a story that induces some sort of emotion and enable the audience (or your date) to be able to relate to your emotions on some level.\u00a0\u00a0 How to do that would take too long to describe, (and hence why I have an entire 55-minute CD devoted to just how to this in my Audio Course) but you you have to start working towards supercharging your conversations more.<\/p>\n<p>\u00a0After dissecting it down to its most basic element, you&#8217;ll find simple emotions will serve as a good guide.\u00a0 Here is one for example: Laughter.\u00a0 If a little anecdote you just shared gets someone to laugh out loud with you, you&#8217;ve just induced an emotional response.\u00a0 So in reality, it&#8217;s rather simple.\u00a0 If your conversation is making her laugh, or it&#8217;s arising curiosity, or creating some sort of intrigue or inquisitiveness, then you&#8217;ve move past simple boring conversation.<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>\u00a0 <span style=\"color: #ff0000;\">A bit of Sponteneity<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>\u00a0It&#8217;s not necessary to show up unannounced with two tickets to Fiji for a girl you just met 3 weeks ago.\u00a0 In fact, that&#8217;d probably creep her out, and we&#8217;ll get to that in a bit as well.\u00a0 However, incorporating a bit of spontaneity will create fun and a sense of adventure.\u00a0 Most people live boring mundane lives and that could very well be despite making a hefty salary and driving an expensive automobile. Introducing spontaneous acts introduces a sense of adventure and it allows for fun.\u00a0 The level of spontaneity will depend on the level of rapport between you two and the amount of time you&#8217;ve known her.\u00a0 It could be something as simple as calling her up and going out for a slice of pie (or whatever).\u00a0 It\u00a0 makes things fun, and it&#8217;s a bit unpredictable too.\u00a0 Speaking of fun, it brings me to my next topic which is:<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>\u00a0<span style=\"color: #ff0000;\">FUN<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>\u00a0 There is not much substitute for being able to have FUN with someone.\u00a0 If you look at your good friends throughout school, university, or now, you&#8217;d find that one common element was that you were able to have fun!\u00a0 I don&#8217;t care if you played sports together, or slept outside on the concrete sidewalk to be first in line for tickets to a concert. Or if you just liked to engage in silly debates about superheroes in comic books.\u00a0 You had Fun!\u00a0\u00a0 That element of FUN is so often forgotten.\u00a0 If you look back at your poor interactions, you&#8217;ll find that this is probably what happened:\u00a0 You went out to dinner, had conversation, it was pleasant, it was nice, there were no hostilities, but it had the feel of a job interview.\u00a0 And unless you happen to be testing fluffers for an upcoming x-rated flick, Job interviews are not typically fun.\u00a0<\/p>\n<p>\u00a0Fun is a good barometer for relationship compatibility.\u00a0 For instance, I know that if I can have fun with a girl, I can continue seeing her in some capacity.\u00a0 On the other hand, if she doesn&#8217;t share my sense of humor, doesn&#8217;t get my jokes, or doesn&#8217;t like to laugh in general, it&#8217;s all shot.\u00a0 There isn&#8217;t going to be compatibility in there.\u00a0 \u00a0Based on your personality, you have to decide HOW you&#8217;re going to create a fun atmosphere.\u00a0 Do keep in mind that some people are fun-challenged.\u00a0 They don&#8217;t know how to have a good time, or they take themselves too seriously.\u00a0 As mentioned, that serves as a good yardstick as to how compatible you&#8217;re going to be.<\/p>\n<p>\u00a0A quick recap thus far:<\/p>\n<p>We covered,<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>Emotionally Charged Conversations<\/li>\n<li>Sponteneity,<\/li>\n<li>Fun,<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>\u00a0The 3 mentioned points above seem so simple, and in essence, they are.\u00a0 However, if you look back at your interactions, you&#8217;ll find the mentioned elements sorely lacking.\u00a0 Implementing and incorporating might take a bit of time but it&#8217;s doable and it doesn&#8217;t have to be complicated.<\/p>\n<p>\u00a0This concludes part 1 of this series.\u00a0 Tune in for the part 2 where I&#8217;ll get more in depth about the issues that are holding you back.\u00a0<\/p>\n<p>Stay tuned for Part 2&#8230;&#8230;&#8230;\u00a0 (<a href=\"http:\/\/attractwomenanywhere.com\/blog\/2009\/12\/06\/dating-attraction-tips-for-the-socially-fit-man-part-2-do-nice-guys-have-to-finish-last\/\" target=\"_blank\">Dating Tips. Do Nice Guys Finish Last?) <\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Dating &amp; Attraction Tips for the Socially Fit Man .\u00a0 I was talking to a\u00a0 female pal the other day, and we started to talk about her dating life, the&hellip;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[193,10],"tags":[15,59,232,194],"class_list":["post-1389","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-general-dating-advice","category-in-field-advice","tag-attraction","tag-dating","tag-how-to-attract-quality-women","tag-how-to-meet-girls"],"aioseo_notices":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/attractwomenanywhere.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1389","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/attractwomenanywhere.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/attractwomenanywhere.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/attractwomenanywhere.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/attractwomenanywhere.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1389"}],"version-history":[{"count":7,"href":"http:\/\/attractwomenanywhere.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1389\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1395,"href":"http:\/\/attractwomenanywhere.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1389\/revisions\/1395"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/attractwomenanywhere.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1389"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/attractwomenanywhere.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1389"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/attractwomenanywhere.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1389"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}