{"id":1937,"date":"2010-03-19T10:52:42","date_gmt":"2010-03-19T17:52:42","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/attractwomenanywhere.com\/blog\/?p=1937"},"modified":"2010-05-31T09:41:39","modified_gmt":"2010-05-31T16:41:39","slug":"how-some-mainstream-advice-mind-fcks-you","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/attractwomenanywhere.com\/blog\/2010\/03\/19\/how-some-mainstream-advice-mind-fcks-you\/","title":{"rendered":"How Some Mainstream Advice Mind-F*cks you."},"content":{"rendered":"<h2 style=\"text-align: center;\"><span style=\"color: #ff0000;\">Mainstream Dating Advice &#8211; Yahoo Dating<\/span><\/h2>\n<p>.\u00a0\u00a0<\/p>\n<p>People find seek Dating-Advice from unorthodox sources when the conventional route has completely failed them.<\/p>\n<p>\u00a0Have you ever made mainstream advice that left you somewhat disenchanted?\u00a0 Maybe even a bit disgusted!\u00a0 It\u2019s usually advice that seems to make sense on paper but does not translate to your experience in the REAL World.\u00a0<\/p>\n<p>\u00a0A while back, I logged on to Yahoo and saw a dating-advice column regarding attraction from one of their writers.\u00a0 It was an article by a dude called \u201cRich\u201d who was trying to share his pearls of wisdom.\u00a0 Now, we don\u2019t even know if he is the real author.\u00a0 They may be just putting up his face as the poster boy for an article someone wrote.<\/p>\n<p>\u00a0Nevertheless, they\u2019re pushing it on their readership and since \u201cYahoo.com\u201d does have a pretty large audience, you can bet a lot of people read this dude\u2019s pontifications.\u00a0 On one hand, he claim to be clueless, and on the other, he is giving advice to both men &amp; women.\u00a0 That\u2019s the funniest part about the guy. He is like, \u201cHey, I\u2019m clueless but lemme break it down for you anyway.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u00a0Apparently, this guy has his own dating-blog on a major magazine online, which makes his comments below ever more fascinating.<\/p>\n<p>So let me print the actual excerpts from that article and I\u2019ll provide my commentary below. Excerpts are in Brown Color.\u00a0 My reply\u00a0is in blue.\u00a0<\/p>\n<p>\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 &#8212;&#8212;&#8212;&#8212;&#8212;&#8212;&#8212;&#8212;&#8212;&#8212;&#8212;&#8212;&#8212;&#8212;&#8212;&#8212;-\u00a0<\/p>\n<p><span style=\"color: #993300;\"><em>My friends and I have spent many a long night brainstorming that magic formula of characteristics that drives the ladies wild. It is impossible to know just what the mixture is supposed to be, but is there one characteristic that can work alone to make a guy really attractive?<\/em><\/span><\/p>\n<p><em><span style=\"color: #993300;\">Here are the nine characteristics we&#8217;ve come up with:<\/span><\/em><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li><em><span style=\"color: #993300;\">Sense of Humor<\/span><\/em><em><br \/>\n<\/em><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p><span style=\"color: #993300;\"><em>Everyone says how important sense of humor is and I&#8217;ve learned to look for it in women <\/em><em>\u00a0I am lucky enough to be able to make women laugh, but I&#8217;m still super single. <\/em><\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"color: #3366ff;\">&#8211;Super single? As opposed to just single?\u00a0 Translation: I can&#8217;t get dates, nor can I maintain a meaningful interaction,\u00a0but I write articles on the topic anyway because I enjoy giving advice on this matter. Yes, sense of humor is attractive, but this guy had to hold many nights of brain-storming sessions to discover this?\u00a0 Wouldn\u2019t you like to be a fly on the wall during these brain-storming sessions where they also recently discovered about gravity, that the earth is round and that humans need to breath air to survive!<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"color: #3366ff;\">Nevertheless, sense of humor is a good attribute to possess.\u00a0 It\u2019s obvious but hey, the guy is trying.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"color: #3366ff;\">.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"color: #3366ff;\">.<\/span><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li><span style=\"color: #993300;\">Trustworthy<\/span><em><span style=\"color: #993300;\">Trust is the holy grail of a relationship. It takes years to build it, and it is so delicate. There are few things that take so long to attain that can be destroyed so quickly. So a lot of us may finally settle on a very trustworthy person when we finally find that.<\/span><\/em><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p><span style=\"color: #3366ff;\">&#8211;Trustworthy is great for relationships but it does not turn on that animal magnetism that draws people.\u00a0 No one looks at someone across the room and thinks, \u201cWow, I want that guy!\u00a0 He just looks sooooooooo\u2026\u2026\u2026.umm\u2026. trustworthy!\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"color: #3366ff;\">\u00a0Trustworthiness has nothing to do with attraction.\u00a0 She only has to trust you enough to know that you\u2019re not the midnight slasher.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"color: #3366ff;\">.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"color: #3366ff;\">.<\/span><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li><span style=\"color: #993300;\">Kindness<em>This seems like a no-brainer, but I&#8217;ve seen plenty of girls stay with guys who don&#8217;t treat them well.\u00a0 So, I&#8217;m thinking that most women look for a nice guy, but the fact of the matter is that mean guys seem to get girlfriends too-and at a better rate than nice guys.<\/em>\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\n<p><\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p><span style=\"color: #0000ff;\">&#8212;No, \u201cSense of Humor\u201d was a no-brainer. Kindness is only relevant if you\u2019re someone who is perceived to be of high social value.\u00a0 Otherwise, it\u2019s totally worthless, unless she is looking for a dog-sitter.\u00a0 This is not to say that one should be a prick either.\u00a0 Kindness is a good quality but learning to attract properly takes precedence.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"color: #0000ff;\">.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"color: #0000ff;\">.<\/span><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li><span style=\"color: #993300;\">Money\u00a0<em><span style=\"color: #993300;\">I admit it: I sometimes envision myself marrying rich and sitting there doing nothing. \u00a0I could lie out on my wife&#8217;s yacht and host lavish parties and hear about how crazy the Roaring 20&#8217;s were, when my wife&#8217;s friends were my age. Money is definitely high on a lot of people&#8217;s list: remember when Anna Nicole Smith married that really old rich guy? I doubt it was because she thought he was hot, funny, or great in the sack.<\/span><br \/>\n\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 <\/em>\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0<\/p>\n<p><\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p><span style=\"color: #0000ff;\">&#8211;Sometimes I envision reading an article where the author has a brain&#8230;.\u00a0 <\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"color: #0000ff;\">-Seriously?\u00a0 <\/span><span style=\"color: #0000ff;\">Anna Nicole Smith?\u00a0 Truth be told, I can\u2019t tell this guy is that retarded or if he is playing a joke on the readers.\u00a0 Sad thing is that I think he is serious.\u00a0 Money does impress people, of course,\u00a0 but by itself is really useful for attracting gold diggers. So if you want to attract strippers or the Anna Nicole Smiths of the world, sure, wear your wallet on your sleeve.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 <\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"color: #0000ff;\">-As for marrying a rich woman?\u00a0 You&#8217;ll have to trade in your self-respect as a man.\u00a0 Sort of reminds of the Bartender who was Tom Cruise&#8217;s Mentor in the movie &#8220;<span style=\"text-decoration: underline;\">Cocktail<\/span>!&#8221;\u00a0 (Really Good movie if you&#8217;re interested in dating-advice, btw.)<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"color: #0000ff;\">.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"color: #0000ff;\">.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li><span style=\"color: #993300;\">Super Hot<em>As much as we hate to admit it, the first thing we notice about someone is how good or bad they look<em><a href=\"http:\/\/www.marieclaire.com\/life\/sex\/dating\/things-men-notice-about-women?link=emb&amp;dom=yah_life&amp;src=syn&amp;con=blog_datingdiaries&amp;mag=mar\" target=\"_blank\">.<\/a><\/em> But one of the first lessons we learn in the dating world is as beautiful as someone is on the outside, they could be ugly on the inside.<\/em>\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\n<p><\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p><span style=\"color: #0000ff;\">&#8212;\u00a0 Surely, he is fucking with us?\u00a0 Being super hot helps??\u00a0\u00a0 Wow, was this another product of those hard working brain-storming sessions of the think-tank?\u00a0 \u00a0So if you look like a male Model, you\u2019re going to have women who are physically attracted to you quite often.\u00a0 That\u2019s great Sherlock.\u00a0 How about the guys out there who are average looking guys?\u00a0 I guess they might as well go and jump off a cliff now\u2026..<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"color: #0000ff;\">.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"color: #0000ff;\">.<\/span><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li><span style=\"color: #993300;\">Confident<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p><em><span style=\"color: #993300;\">Confidence is based on a lot of these characteristics. You are confident if you are talented, super hot, intelligent, or wealthy most likely. But confidence also enables you to treat people better, so you are kind and trustworthy as well. Because confidence includes so many of these other characteristic, it may just be the one major thing women look for in a man.<\/span><\/em><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"color: #0000ff;\">&#8211;Confidence is one of the most important ingredients.\u00a0 BUT HOW Do you get it?\u00a0 I\u2019ve had workshop clients who were doctors, business men and lawyers, all successful in their careers who lacked confidence.\u00a0 There are building blocks on developing confidence and it does not require being \u201cSuper Hot\u201d or wealthy.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"color: #0000ff;\">.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"color: #0000ff;\">.<\/span><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li><span style=\"color: #993300;\">Talented &amp; Passionate<\/span><em><span style=\"color: #993300;\">When someone possesses a special skill, such as visual art or guitar virtuosity, they get tons of girls. People like Jimi Hendrix, Led Zeppelin, and Tom Brady can go out with anyone they want because they are skilled. Heck, I&#8217;d go out with them. Usually skill occurs in tandem with passion, another attractive quality. When someone is really good at something, but not &#8220;hot,&#8221; it makes sense that they can still attract a lot of women. It&#8217;s less annoying to see someone like this in a relationship than it is to see a rich mean guy in a relationship.<\/span><\/em><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>-However, none of it is even remotely as annoying as reading this guy\u2019s article.\u00a0 Let\u2019s give he and his pals credit: They got one right.\u00a0 Talented and Passionate is an important ingredient.\u00a0\u00a0We can delve deeper into that by realizing why that is, but\u00a0you could read about that in my other articles.<\/p>\n<p>.<\/p>\n<p>.<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li><span style=\"color: #993300;\">Intelligent<em>I am intimidated by women who are more intelligent than I am (which explains why I&#8217;m intimidated by about 97% of the female population). For a lot of people, intelligence is sexy. When someone is stupid, it&#8217;s frustrating and boring, which is enough to drive someone away.<\/em>\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\n<p><\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p><span style=\"color: #0000ff;\">&#8211;Intelligence is attractive to other intelligent people.\u00a0 In and of by itself, however, it only stimulates the logical mind, not the emotional mind.\u00a0 Attraction is built through emotions not logic.\u00a0 Hence, a moron with confidence could be a player while a noble prize winning Astro-physicist gets to watch from the sidelines.\u00a0 <\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"color: #0000ff;\">.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"color: #0000ff;\">.<\/span><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li><span style=\"color: #993300;\">Convenient<em>One can argue that convenience is a huge driver for a relationship. Does he live near you, is he &#8220;ready&#8221; to be in a relationship, does he want to have kids or not?<em> Everything matches up correctly<\/em>. Sure, he may not be the best-looking guy or have a lot of money, but it&#8217;s just what you need and it&#8217;s been a long, difficult search.<\/em>\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\n<p><\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p><span style=\"color: #0000ff;\">&#8211;Convenience can play a factor in relationships but unless you\u2019re living in a cabin in the woods like the Unabomber, you\u2019re going to have a lot of people around you in a normal city.\u00a0 The convenience this guy is talking about is \u201cSettling.\u201d\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Hey look, we&#8217;ve all probably been guilty of\u00a0taking the easy route at some point. \u00a0That doesn\u2019t mean you ought to settle however.<\/span><\/p>\n<p>\u00a0.<br \/>\n<em><span style=\"color: #993300;\">If we put these characteristics on a pie chart, what would get the biggest piece of the pie with you? Again, some of these characteristics occur together: intelligence and wealth, talent and passion, kindness and generosity, convenience and wealth. <\/span><\/em><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"color: #0000ff;\">&#8211;I don\u2019t know.\u00a0 IF the character the Punisher was real and came to your brain storming session and shot down you and your friends, would anyone notice?\u00a0 We could all speculate.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><em><span style=\"color: #993300;\">How often do women care about <em>superficial things like money?<\/em> It&#8217;s scary, but sometimes I fear that no matter how funny I am, if I had lots of money I could date any cute girl I wanted.<\/span><\/em><\/p>\n<p>How do all of these characteristics shake out for you when choosing a boyfriend, and are there any you&#8217;d add to the list? Does confidence just take all of these characteristics into consideration?<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: center;\">\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 &#8212;&#8212;&#8212;&#8212;&#8212;&#8212;&#8212;&#8212;&#8212;&#8211;<\/p>\n<p><em><span style=\"color: #993300;\">\u00a0<\/span><\/em><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"color: #000000;\">&#8211;This poor guy sounds more confused than some of the guys I run into at seminars and conferences.\u00a0 The real question is how did he get a gig writing for Yahoo?\u00a0 The point of this is not to single this dude out.\u00a0 His writing are representative of what a lot of dudes feel when it comes to dating.<\/span><\/p>\n<p>\u00a0\u00a0To some people, the guy\u2019s article will seem like common sense, and to others, it\u2019ll be utterly ridiculous. The Internet as well as mainstream magazines are full of such advice.\u00a0 This is why the seduction community was created in the first place.\u00a0 Guys who were fed up with arm-chair theory,\u00a0wanted something that worked.<\/p>\n<p>\u00a0\u00a0Granted, I\u2019m having some fun picking on this guy for the ridiculous article he has put forth, but it\u2019s important to note that his article is s a microcosm of what exists out there.\u00a0\u00a0There are men who are resentful or disenchanted because they reflect the following feeling:<\/p>\n<blockquote><p>Hey, I am nice, caring, interesting, kind, and have a decent career.\u00a0 Can\u2019t attract too many women, (or too lengthy a dry-periods in between dates.).\u00a0 Why is that?<\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p>\u00a0<\/p>\n<p>\u00a0Hence, there are a lot of guys who seek advice in the alternative route.\u00a0 However, only 10-20% find\u00a0for\u00a0success for reasons I mentioned long ago.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0(<a href=\"http:\/\/attractwomenanywhere.com\/blog\/2009\/02\/04\/why-90-of-men-flunk-in-the-sedcution-community\/\" target=\"_blank\">Flunking in Community<\/a>)<\/p>\n<p>\u00a0As for the other 80%, many give up and go away.\u00a0 Some insist on guru worship, (yes, the guy going to his 10th DeAngelo Seminar) and doing the same things over though he is not getting results.\u00a0 And then,\u00a0\u00a0a small percentage become angry for not having success in dating and turn their anger towards whomever they can fid in the dating-advice realm.<\/p>\n<p>Truth of the matter is anyone can become improve in attracting women, just like anyone can improve their physique following the proper physical training and nutritional plan.\u00a0 Most people will not put the effort in.\u00a0 If you do you can LEARN solid skills that will help you, such as :<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>\u00a0Learn to Flirt more effictively<\/li>\n<li>\u00a0Increase social intelligence (know what to say, and WHEN)<\/li>\n<li>\u00a0become more interesting (Conversational skills)<\/li>\n<li>\u00a0Learn to be convey sexuality,<\/li>\n<li>\u00a0Learn to Lead (in all 3 ways.)<\/li>\n<li>\u00a0Take steps to gain confidence<\/li>\n<li>\u00a0Deal with anxiety, low self-image issues,<\/li>\n<li>\u00a0Work on body language, demeanor.<\/li>\n<li>\u00a0\u00a0And more\u2026.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0<\/p>\n<p>\u00a0\u00a0 If you&#8217;re not willing to work on key points, then you have no one to blame but yourself.\u00a0 If you do work on them, you&#8217;ll attract more women and will never have to resort to reading mind-fucking articles such as the one written by &#8220;Rich&#8221; for Marie Claire magazine&#8230;.\u00a0<\/p>\n<p>Cameron<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"http:\/\/www.attractwomenanywhere.com\/ebook.shtml\" target=\"_blank\">Building Attraction Ebook<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Mainstream Dating Advice &#8211; Yahoo Dating .\u00a0\u00a0 People find seek Dating-Advice from unorthodox sources when the conventional route has completely failed them. \u00a0Have you ever made mainstream advice that left&hellip;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[193],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1937","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-general-dating-advice"],"aioseo_notices":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/attractwomenanywhere.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1937","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/attractwomenanywhere.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/attractwomenanywhere.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/attractwomenanywhere.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/attractwomenanywhere.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1937"}],"version-history":[{"count":8,"href":"http:\/\/attractwomenanywhere.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1937\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1942,"href":"http:\/\/attractwomenanywhere.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1937\/revisions\/1942"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/attractwomenanywhere.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1937"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/attractwomenanywhere.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1937"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/attractwomenanywhere.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1937"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}