How to Spot Bullshit in Dating Advice 


I am starting a topic of Blog entries where I’ll be exposing bullshit dating Advice sites.  Now, I can’t name names of direct companies, but I’ll give you some hints that you can apply yourself.  Today’s entry has to be credited to by my buddy Jay [AKA Formhandle] because he sent out a twitter message regarding this very dynamic:

  •  Dating-Advice sites with photos of Bikini Clad women all over

 Nothing screams bullshit more than a dating site that has plastered photographs of bikini-clad women all over it.  (Well, unless you’re watching old music videos of Ricky Martin or George Michael trying to act straight.  That’s topic for another day, however.)

 I mean I can appreciate the underhanded attempts at legitimacy.  Sure, photos of hot women in bikinis must mean that the advice is legit.  I mean how could you not conclude that?  In fact, those women were probably photographed by the same writers using the very advice they’re dishing out.

 What’s next?  Maybe we can extrapolate that to various industries.   If it’s one industry that can use a facelift, it’s fast food. 

  We’ll be seeing photographs of Filet Mignon and Top Sirloin steaks from grass-fed organically raised Cows on the walls of McDonald’s and Taco Bell. Imagine walking to your local McDonald’s tomorrow and seeing photographs of happy cows in nature giving each other high-fives.  There is Shepard in the back reading a copy of the “Alchemist” about to take a nap.  All part of the free flowing fun in nature.  Certainly better than the image of low grade beef from diseased cows that were pumped full of antibiotics and hormones. 

 I think the Nudie-bar industry could use the same strategy.  I imagine a strip-club where there are studious photographs of the very strippers you just saw grinding/dry humping a pervert in sweatpants.   There could be photos of them in the libraries of Harvard and Stanford where they spent their time after the shift is over studying for their PH.D in advanced genetic sciences.  Yes, they be conducting advanced stem cell research to cure the diseases of the guy they just blew in the back for a few ounces of weed.   Not to mention a philanthropic dedication to African children that would even make Angelina Jolie envious. 

Genetic Research at Work

 All this to the tune of Louis Armstrong’s “What a wonderful world.”

 Call me crazy, but something tells me you’d be slightly skeptical.  Well, the same applies to dating sites plastering hot women all over.  In fact, there probably is a scientific correlation of poor advice to hot-women photos. There is an inverse ratio:  The more hot bikini-women photos, the poorer the advice. 

 This is just the first in the series of spotting bullshit.  Stay tuned for future Blog entries where I’ll discuss how to spot bullshit just from looking at the photos of someone and how to spot a guru who most likely has no friends outside of his devout followers on the World Wide Web…..

 More episodes to come….  In the meanwhile, back to bikinis.  If you’re a connoisseur of bikinis and are in the market to purchase one for a girl you’ve been dating recently, you’re partaking in a noble cause. Here is a link to help you pick out the proper swimsuit for your new girlfriend.


 ps.  (Anyone have any idea how I can get SI to link back to me?)