The Guru Epidemic – Self Help Industry- Part 2

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  In the last article, The Guru Epidemic, I talked about the behavior of most Gurus and their Modus Operandi.  Someone unfamiliar, (or even familiar) with self-help gurus and teachers of enlightenment may natually wonder: WHY do people take refuge in gurus?

  • SO WHY DO SO MANY PEOPLE GO TO GURUS?

 Come on Cameron.  The picture you paint is not very flattering.  Why would people worship these individuals?

Well, I’ll share a quick story that may help you see this dynamic from another perspective.

A gentleman by the name of David DeAngelo has been giving Dating advice online since about 2001.  He has countless DVDs, seminars, and audio products on dating advice.  You probably have heard of him.    2 years ago, ”David DeAngelo” decided to give seminars on marketing under his real name Eben Pagen.

 Yet, some of the same people who attended his dating seminars, STILL chose to willingly attend his marketing seminars though they had zero interest in learning about Internet Marketing   A very analytical friend of mine was about to lose his mind.  As though he were “Rainman” on uppers, he kept repeating,  “But I don’t get it!  They’re looking for dating advice.  This is a marketing seminar!  Why are they paying 5000 Dollars to see this guy speak about marketing when they want DATING advice? Why, why, why???”

To which I replied:

“You’re not getting it emotionally.  That’s Daddy up there!  That’s their father on stage!!!   That’s why they’re there, a chance to see daddy one more time”

 

There you have it!  The guru relationships.  Most subjects, specially in the DATING FIELD, (I don’t know if this’d apply in the financial-advice field for example) are NOT EVEN SEEKING ADVICE.  THEY’RE LOOKING FOR A FATHER amidst these gurus.

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Guru is not your father

 

 

 The over-bearing guru who has all of the answers represents a father-figure most guys  at that seminar have not had.  Maybe they had fathers who were meek, or perhaps their dad was never around. In these modern times, people are missing father figures, and hence, they seek to fill that void through finding gurus who can tell them what to do, give them direction, and tough love.  (To be fair, David D never signed up for this.  However, there are plenty of “Gurus who relish in taking this role and do take advantage of it).

 I think if you had a father who was a masculine figure, a man’s man, who spent time with you when you were a kid, you’d have a hard time ending up in the guru-worshipping circles.  You could even get sucked in for a short while perhaps, but you’d snap out of it quickly.   A lack of a strong caring father figure is a common trend you’d find as the common element in the guru worhippers.

 I should add that I am not condemning anyone for going to a seminar to improve on anything, whether it’s financial advice, or how to be a better Tennis player weekend crashcourse.  Being progressive is a great attribute.  However, when the knack for being for being progressive is replaced by a need for a father figure/guru who influences your every decision, you’ve crossed  on over into a slippery slope.

 Would you like to be horrified for a bit?   This will only take you 10 minutes and save your hours of time from having to watch another shitty “Saw” movie.    Stick your head in “Tony Robbins Forums” for 10 minutes and be sure to  have a vomit-bucket close by.  You’ll find people who can’t figure out what to do for exercise, or what to eat for breakfast, or how to tie on their shoelaces without Tony Robins telling them the proper way to do it.  Again, Tony seems like a nice guy.  I don’t know that he set out to do this, but it’s bound to happen. 

 If you happen to be one of these people and can identify with the above people, then maybe you should look into getting your issues fixed.   Most people assume “Gurus” to be a notch, (or two or three notches) above average normal people.  The ultimate irony is that most gurus are a notch (or two or three) BELOW normal average people. (For reasons mentioned above, and trust me, I’ve spent enough time with self proclaimed gurus.)  

  If you want to learn to better social skills, and learn more about attracting women, then yes, learn from me. Get my audio course.  If you want to read more good stuff, then learn from “Stephen Nash” or “Sinn”.  If you want to learn the piano, then hire a piano-teacher, and if you want to learn to play basketball better, then hire the proper basketball coach. 

There are some people who don’t sign up to be a guru, but end up being one by default because they’re such strong masculine figures.  My buddy Steve P. probably falls under that category but it doesn’t change the fact that he does great work to create change through hypno-therapy.  Steve is also a guy you can hang with, talk about movies, business, or MMA.  There are rare exceptions as I mentioned.

If you’re looking for a guru to be your father, then you’ll have to address that on your own.  I have enough understanding of social behaviors and dynamics to take full advantage of people seeking fathers, but it’s not my style.  It’s not who I am.  I’ll leave that to the guys who have all of the answers, who occasionally carry an Asian assistant behind them.  (I’m telling you: Look for the crony walking behind.)

 Then how will you know when you have arrived?  How will you know when you’ve had enough seminars to become enlightened?  How is anyone ever suppose to really know?  You know when you know!  (A truly guru-esque answer, btw. Thank you!)   You know when you’ve arrived at that point when you know what want to do, and now it’s a matter of doing it.  You start exploring the how, and by that I mean, you start exploring what specific actions you have to take. 

 Study those who are successful in that endeavor.  They know what they wanted to do, and then started doing it. Sometimes, it took them a while to get their act together, and if they’re famous, there maybe a mug-shot of them on some Internet website just for laughs. Sometimes it takes a few years to figure out your “Stuff” and along the way, you may stop at a few seminars, and read some books.  You’ll figure out and you’ll know you’ve arrived when you know that you don’t need any gurus anymore…. 

 I believe that gurus are only building on the same psychological principles that were started 1000s of years ago with the advents of prophets.   Whether it was Moses, Jesus or Muhammad, these individuals recognized that probably a good 80% of the population desperately needed a figurehead to give them answers, without which, they could not find purpose!  (This theme of Purpose & Identity is so ever recurring.) So these clever individuals took on that role.  Seriosuly, could you other wise sell that story about a guy living inside a whale?  But let’s get back to the modern day gurus… 

     Ultimately, you learn that no human being has ALL of the answers.  A little spirituality is good, but still, no person (or team of persons) has all of the answers.  Those who achieve great things have a drive that comes from within and they have a certain strength that they’re going to push forward.  This sense of achievement is not always material or financial.   Sometimes, it’s a simple story about an individual who had to learn to walk again after being told by doctors that he would not be able to ever walk again following a tragic accident. 

 It’s having the confidence in yourself that you’re going to get it done, and you shall find a way to do so.  Along the way, you’re going to learn a few things, including things about yourself, and certainly, there will be people/family/friends/coaches/teachers/professors who will contribute to this endeavor.

 Or so that is my finding. 

Cameron