You Just May be a Candidate for a Seduction Community Cult!

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 A blog reader sent me an email recently which was insightful.  He and I have had a few email exchanges over the last few months, and I am glad he finally was able to put all of the over-analyzing of tactics behind him. He sent me the following email:

Cameron,
Thanks for all your help man.

I had a discussion with a friend of mine from Britain. He fucking hates the PUAs and mostly all guys who sell this kind of stuff. You’re one of the few guys who’s real in this whole thing…

Stephen Nash also is kinda ok.  Barry sometimes makes real disgusting/weird jokes. I’m doing a treatment now from the psychiatrist for some issues of mine but … no more community stuff. Definetely through with it. I’ll go with Zan’s openness and discretion + the stuff from your blog + being fucking myself + GYM, and living my passions. No more BEE ASS.
If I ever become a guy that has it all together .. you’ve contributed to that enough. :)

Thanks man.
Leon

Hey Leon.  It’s not a matter of “IF” you become a guy who has it together. It’s a matter of when, and that’ll happen when your purpose and your sense of who you are [identity] is solidified.   Basically, it’s a matter of knowing where you want to go, and having a plan on how to get there. That sounds simple, but along the way, sometimes, we become distracted.

As for the dating arena, just focus on the basics.  Make progress checks of where you are.  In the recent article I posted regarding the 3 areas of dating advice:

  1. Social Skills.
  2. Social Intelligence.
  3. Social Confidence.

(You can read that article here: 3 Areas of Dating Advice  Benefit)

Here is the issue for anyone who is in the same boat as Leon:    Too much advice from too many different sources creates confusion, and in case of Leon, it led to this “The World is Against me” mindset.  A mindset, where he is trying to figure out how to constantly one-up people, appear cooler than they are, and have a stronger frame.    It’s not a healthy way to go about your day.  As far as dating advice is concerned: There is an over abundance of it to the point where it creates mass confusion and paralysis.

I’ve remained outspoken about whom I recommend.  I’d highly recommend you take a look at my stuff on developing your attributes and foundational skills.  Social intelligence, conversational skills, story-telling! Guess what?  Being socially well-adjusted is going to always benefit you for LIFE.  (Not just in dating, but at work and social circles.)

I also highly recommend Sinn’s material from a micro-perpsective of trying to figure out your sticking point.  Stephen Nash has good material on how to get a girlfriend, build social circles, and a social life.  Zan has some really good stuff on overall macro-perspective on the process, but too much Zan will have you checking out of reality and landing you in fantasyland.  Steve P. does great individual hypnotherapy in helping guys (and women) get over their issues.

You may personally like or dislike any of the individuals above, but their material is good and helpful.  It also provides an overall picture.

OK, what if RIGHT NOW, you’re someone who has studied all of the above material and you’ve made no progress?  My first guess is that you’ve just read material as though it were a textbook in school.  You haven’t implemented one iota.  It’s as if you’ve read 7 books on the Martial Arts and still can’t throw one punch, because you haven’t practiced it.

What if you have some practice, made some gains, but still are overcome by massive anxiety, and feelings of discomfort?  Then, in my not-so-humble opinion, you have other issues besides “Game” that you probably should get worked on.  Get yourself fixed, then come for dating advice.

Dating Advice from proper sources WORKS!  Far too many people have benefited from it, and so can you.  However, dating advice is just that: Dating Advice.  It’s not therapy.  Similarly therapy is not dating advice.  Keep each element in perspective.  When you start mixing these things is when you open yourself to hucksters and charlatans.

In this case, you’re the person most susceptible to quick-fixes that seem magical and sometimes are even cult like.  These gimmicks  include, but are not limited to: Spiritual-woo woo-forms of seduction, infatuation with Eckhart Tolle, utter infatuation with Tony Robbins, quick fix advice that says all you need to know to do is tell girls you want to fuck them, intrigue with NLP and trying to pattern people so they bend to your will, and other stuff that makes you weird, creepy, and will leave you deserted.  (Not to metion a plethora of marketers who are just blatant charlatans.)

Let me ask you this: If you broke your fibula (Shin bone) in the lower part of your leg…. I  mean a bad break where the f*cking bone is sticking out through your skin, you get the idea…  Would your choice be to go to a top notch surgeon from Harvard Medical School?   Or would you go to Eckhart Tolle, or to a car mechanic?

You have about as much business going to a dating-coach if you suffer from massive anxieties, paranoid thoughts, depression and such as you do going to a car mechanic for your broken leg.  Whatever your mode of therapy, fix the depression and such, then apply the dating-advice.

Anyhow, that’s just one person’s opinion.   [Oh, I can still see the dismay of my favorite English teacher in high school upon the words "In my Opinion."  He'd yell, "Of course, YOUR opinion!  It's your essay!  Whose opinion would it be?"]    Well, little does he know, I am able to channel wise beings from other galaxies who can share with  me such secrets.  OK, enough jokes.  Seriously, it’s my opinion.  Take it or leave it.  Get your shit fixed regardless.

If legit dating advice isn’t helping you make progress in your dating life, then you’re either not applying what you’ve learned, or you have deeper rooted issues. You’ll improve in general when you get the proper help, and the legit dating advice will even make more of an impact when you can apply it from a more secure place.

Cameron

Improve on the 3 areas mentioned in this article here: 16 CD Audio Course - Building Attraction with Women